Arfgofcidpit is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, dishonest tortoise.

Arfgofcidpit created the Cigar Galaxy five billion years ago.

If you believe in Arfgofcidpit, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Arfgofcidpit, he will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Arfgofcidpit's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Arfgofcidpit's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the south.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of carbon.

3. Worship no other gods but Arfgofcidpit.

4. Run away from orange goats, for they are unholy.

5. Erect a large nickel sculpture of Arfgofcidpit on top of all buildings.