Spagnurlgep is a god.

It takes the form of a giant, narcissistic owl.

Spagnurlgep created a top quark five million years ago.

If you believe in Spagnurlgep, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Spagnurlgep, it will be mildly annoyed.

Spagnurlgep's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Spagnurlgep's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about gravity.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of iron.

3. Never talk about tapirs.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Spagnurlgep loves doves, so they must be respected.