Dobcaptarcud is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, temperamental capybara.

Dobcaptarcud created everything that exists four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dobcaptarcud, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Dobcaptarcud, he will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Dobcaptarcud's most sacred site is Glastonbury Tor in England.

Dobcaptarcud's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never sit in holy places.

3. Draw representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Never talk about foxes.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.