Dibdodlarnrak is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, stupid cobra.

Dibdodlarnrak created gold five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dibdodlarnrak, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Dibdodlarnrak, she will refuse to believe in you.

Dibdodlarnrak's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Dibdodlarnrak's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Never feed peanuts to snakes while wearing blue coats.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Learn nine new languages a year.

5. Dibdodlarnrak must be the most important thing in your life.