Likkem is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, uncaring hippopotamus.

Likkem created dark matter six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Likkem, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Likkem, he will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Likkem's most sacred site is Karikalampakkam in India.

Likkem's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Never talk about cats.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Likkem loves tortoises, so they must be respected.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.