Tandontin is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, compassionate dragon.

Tandontin created tapeworms three billion years ago.

If you believe in Tandontin, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Tandontin, he will turn you into a dog.

Tandontin's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Tandontin's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place in violet.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Walk at least nine thousand metres per day.

4. Never chant in the presence of sharks.

5. Do not stand on grass.