Labsogcet is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, dishonourable centipede.

Labsogcet created the Andromeda Galaxy nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Labsogcet, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Labsogcet, he will refuse to believe in you.

Labsogcet's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Labsogcet's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured voles.

2. Put Labsogcet first in all things.

3. Labsogcet must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Never think about archaea.

5. Never paint your feet black.