Wabhatgom is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, almighty wasp.

Wabhatgom created dark energy twelve years ago.

If you believe in Wabhatgom, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Wabhatgom, she will turn you into a frog.

Wabhatgom's most sacred site is Khwee in Botswana.

Wabhatgom's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about thermodynamics near geese while wearing turquoise jumpers and balancing six silicon spheres on your arms.

2. Erect a giant aluminium sculpture of Wabhatgom in the centre of the settlement.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Learn four new languages a year.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.