Inggesstonk is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, competent monkey.

Inggesstonk created gold seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Inggesstonk, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Inggesstonk, she will think nothing of it.

Inggesstonk's most sacred site is Artena in Italy.

Inggesstonk's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Erect a giant gray sculpture of Inggesstonk in the centre of the settlement.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Hide from magenta eagles for they are unholy.