Vadyatbin is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, emotional gerbil.

Vadyatbin created humanity six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vadyatbin, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Vadyatbin, she will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Vadyatbin's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Vadyatbin's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Never look at comets.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Never mention voles.