Wodmapgig is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, all-powerful chicken.

Wodmapgig created energy eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wodmapgig, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Wodmapgig, she will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Wodmapgig's most sacred site is Ringford in Scotland.

Wodmapgig's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no gulls in a building before entering it.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Never write about ribonucleic acid.

4. Erect seven zinc sculptures of Wodmapgig on top of important buildings.

5. Hide from indigo mites for they are unholy.