Flancemmip is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, duplicitous porpoise.

Flancemmip created matter twelve years ago.

If you believe in Flancemmip, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Flancemmip, he will destroy your favourite planet.

Flancemmip's most sacred site is Qantir in Egypt.

Flancemmip's Holy Commandments

1. Always help mites.

2. Always treat ducks with great respect.

3. Run away from magenta badgers, for they are unholy.

4. Never write about nebulae.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.