Vadnurt is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, ruthless crane.

Vadnurt created a charm quark three million years ago.

If you believe in Vadnurt, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Vadnurt, it will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Vadnurt's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Vadnurt's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat aubergines.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Never think about gravity.

4. Always wear fawn.

5. Never pour water over plants.