Kimxucmon is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, benevolent turtle.

Kimxucmon created the cosmos six million years ago.

If you believe in Kimxucmon, he will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Kimxucmon, he will not care.

Kimxucmon's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Kimxucmon's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Do not sprint in public.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Do not chop down trees.