Nellgepbat is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, narcissistic deer.

Nellgepbat created viruses four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nellgepbat, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Nellgepbat, he will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Nellgepbat's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Nellgepbat's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Never write about fluid mechanics.

3. Run away if six porpoises approach from the east.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Put Nellgepbat first in all things.