Dibmifquim is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, tiresome frog.

Dibmifquim created snails three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dibmifquim, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Dibmifquim, he will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Dibmifquim's most sacred site is Evol in France.

Dibmifquim's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear magenta kilts.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Never write about thermodynamics.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Hide if seven dolphins approach from the north.