Yimtitgumbag is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, charitable centaur.

Yimtitgumbag created a strange quark four million years ago.

If you believe in Yimtitgumbag, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Yimtitgumbag, she will denounce you as a heretic.

Yimtitgumbag's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Yimtitgumbag's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about geese.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Yimtitgumbag.

3. Always make sure there are no badgers in a room before entering it.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Always stare at clouds.