Ponyoggumdam is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, ruthless frog.

Ponyoggumdam created the Whirlpool Galaxy eight million years ago.

If you believe in Ponyoggumdam, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Ponyoggumdam, it will attempt to scare you with hail.

Ponyoggumdam's most sacred site is Hetta in Finland.

Ponyoggumdam's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about gravity.

2. Always obey Ponyoggumdam's priests.

3. Never run in holy places.

4. Run away from violet doves, for they are unholy.

5. Do not chop down trees.