Jatnabbeg is a god.

It takes the form of a large, all-powerful zebra.

Jatnabbeg created dark energy four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Jatnabbeg, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Jatnabbeg, it will think nothing of it.

Jatnabbeg's most sacred site is Polydrosos in Greece.

Jatnabbeg's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill monkeys.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Never talk about comets.