Kombifbat is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, selfish newt.

Kombifbat created vertebrates eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Kombifbat, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Kombifbat, he will turn you into a dog.

Kombifbat's most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.

Kombifbat's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if four moths approach from the north.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Do not dye your hair yellow.

4. Never go into indigo rooms.

5. Do not listen to music.