Kikflanbegcip is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, grumpy dolphin.

Kikflanbegcip created the Cigar Galaxy nine million years ago.

If you believe in Kikflanbegcip, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Kikflanbegcip, he will refuse to believe in you.

Kikflanbegcip's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Kikflanbegcip's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Never write about amino acids.

4. Never sing in holy places.

5. Kikflanbegcip loves grasshopers, so they must be respected.