Mildapgum Honkadzim is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, clever ant.

Mildapgum Honkadzim created the Sombrero Galaxy seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Mildapgum Honkadzim, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Mildapgum Honkadzim, he will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Mildapgum Honkadzim's most sacred site is Buskerud in Norway.

Mildapgum Honkadzim's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Do not trade with those who eat tomatoes.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Always help sick snails.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.