Fligtonkrothub is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, happy tapir.

Fligtonkrothub created snails three million years ago.

If you believe in Fligtonkrothub, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Fligtonkrothub, he will turn you into a goat.

Fligtonkrothub's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Fligtonkrothub's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about coconuts.

2. Do not shave your neck.

3. Do not hurt ducks.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Fligtonkrothub must be the most important thing in your life.