Cemfasxuck is a god.

It takes the form of an one thousand metre long, tranquil cobra.

Cemfasxuck created Mount Everest three million years ago.

If you believe in Cemfasxuck, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Cemfasxuck, it will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Cemfasxuck's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Cemfasxuck's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Never write about gravity.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Grasshopers are unholy and should not be approached.