Gidnigfat is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, thoughtless goblin.

Gidnigfat created dark energy eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gidnigfat, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Gidnigfat, he will laugh at you.

Gidnigfat's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Gidnigfat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about onions.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Pray towards the south.

4. Erect three nickel sculptures of Gidnigfat on top of important buildings.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.