Gunraptanban is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, tranquil yak.

Gunraptanban created the planet Saturn six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gunraptanban, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Gunraptanban, he will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Gunraptanban's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Gunraptanban's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

2. Put Gunraptanban first in all things.

3. Never think ill of sick nematodes.

4. Never talk about horizontal gene transfer.

5. Never play with disobedient children.