Dagquimlistlan is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, able jackal.

Dagquimlistlan created humanity nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dagquimlistlan, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Dagquimlistlan, she will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Dagquimlistlan's most sacred site is Cobbel in Germany.

Dagquimlistlan's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Dagquimlistlan.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Never write about galaxies.

4. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.

5. Always help gulls in need.