Cembamdanbimhen is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, witty donkey.

Cembamdanbimhen created life three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cembamdanbimhen, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Cembamdanbimhen, she will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Cembamdanbimhen's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Cembamdanbimhen's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into orange rooms.

2. Always look after injured eagles.

3. Do not eat corn.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.