Dibfetquag is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, conceited goose.

Dibfetquag created matter four million years ago.

If you believe in Dibfetquag, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Dibfetquag, it will be very unhappy.

Dibfetquag's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Dibfetquag's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Dibfetquag eight times a day.

2. Never hurt horses.

3. Never talk about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

4. Dibfetquag loves sharks, so they must be honoured.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.