Vonvagzen is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, flying gnu.

Vonvagzen created the Sol system nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vonvagzen, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Vonvagzen, he will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Vonvagzen's most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Vonvagzen's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Vonvagzen's priests.

2. Worship no other gods but Vonvagzen.

3. Never laugh in the presence of monkeys.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Never talk about fire.