Kikbegpid is a god.

It takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, dishonourable mouse.

Kikbegpid created viruses eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kikbegpid, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Kikbegpid, it will come to you in dreams.

Kikbegpid's most sacred site is Troms in Norway.

Kikbegpid's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Do not kill horses.

3. Always obey Kikbegpid's priests.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate frogs.