Nabtailkarcarhomboss Nullponxen is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, kind lobster.

Nabtailkarcarhomboss Nullponxen created the Milkyway six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nabtailkarcarhomboss Nullponxen, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Nabtailkarcarhomboss Nullponxen, she will not care at all.

Nabtailkarcarhomboss Nullponxen's most sacred site is Hoddom in Scotland.

Nabtailkarcarhomboss Nullponxen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat lemons.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Do not speak about bananas.