Nignutjig is a god.

She takes the form of a small, merciful crab.

Nignutjig created a quark six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nignutjig, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Nignutjig, she will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Nignutjig's most sacred site is Syndendro in Greece.

Nignutjig's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Nignutjig three times a day.

2. Never write about evolution by means of natural selection.

3. Never bounce near capybaras.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Erect seven carbon sculptures of Nignutjig on top of important buildings.