Mitwanbimbissrill is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, unsympathetic aardvark.

Mitwanbimbissrill created the Andromeda Galaxy three billion years ago.

If you believe in Mitwanbimbissrill, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Mitwanbimbissrill, he will boil you in a big pot.

Mitwanbimbissrill's most sacred site is Panayadikuppam in India.

Mitwanbimbissrill's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

2. Do not dye your hair brown.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Never write about gravity.

5. Never eat bark.