Rotvidkar is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, quiet dolphin.

Rotvidkar created the world nine million years ago.

If you believe in Rotvidkar, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Rotvidkar, she will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Rotvidkar's most sacred site is Romlund in Denmark.

Rotvidkar's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear turquoise shorts.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Never think about nebulae.

4. Never feed gooseberries to goats while wearing black rings.

5. Never go into yellow rooms.