Pashittif is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, astonishing alligator.

Pashittif created an electron eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Pashittif, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Pashittif, he will destroy your home galaxy.

Pashittif's most sacred site is Iskmo in Finland.

Pashittif's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Never talk about comets.

3. Never write about evolution by means of natural selection.

4. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

5. Put Pashittif first in all things.