Betarnran is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, tiresome jaguar.

Betarnran created Africa eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Betarnran, he will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Betarnran, he will turn you into a small brown duck.

Betarnran's most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Betarnran's Holy Commandments

1. Do not sit in public.

2. Betarnran must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Do not dye your hair purple.

5. Do not stand on grass.