Besshapkim is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, compassionate skunk.

Besshapkim created gold six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Besshapkim, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Besshapkim, he will destroy your favourite planet.

Besshapkim's most sacred site is Vandet in Denmark.

Besshapkim's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Besshapkim four times a day.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Never jump in the presence of otters.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Fast once a month.