Rutbonkham is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, duplicitous hedgehog.

Rutbonkham created bats eight million years ago.

If you believe in Rutbonkham, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Rutbonkham, she will try to impress you with trees.

Rutbonkham's most sacred site is Skive in Denmark.

Rutbonkham's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no hamsters in a building before entering it.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Feed all hungry bats.

5. Never play with disobedient children.