Yakbetran is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, annoying octopus.

Yakbetran created a top quark four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yakbetran, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Yakbetran, he will torture you forever.

Yakbetran's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Yakbetran's Holy Commandments

1. Yakbetran must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Run away if eight shrews approach from the east.

3. Erect three tin sculptures of Yakbetran on top of important buildings.

4. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

5. Always wear orange.