Cabgofhog is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, self-confident mouse.

Cabgofhog created Asia four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cabgofhog, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Cabgofhog, she will turn you into a puffin.

Cabgofhog's most sacred site is Elatos in Greece.

Cabgofhog's Holy Commandments

1. Manatees are not to be trusted.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Cabgofhog.

3. Never think about black holes.

4. Cabgofhog must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Never eat green fruit.