Listbattam is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, stupid deer.

Listbattam created a charm quark four years ago.

If you believe in Listbattam, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Listbattam, she will turn you into a frog.

Listbattam's most sacred site is Aimala in Finland.

Listbattam's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about swans.

2. Never think about the strong nuclear force.

3. Do not speak about gooseberries.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never think about amino acids.