Ortsisbaf Fumwotyatt Himfunsiglarn is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, contented mink.

Ortsisbaf Fumwotyatt Himfunsiglarn created a charm quark five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ortsisbaf Fumwotyatt Himfunsiglarn, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Ortsisbaf Fumwotyatt Himfunsiglarn, it will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Ortsisbaf Fumwotyatt Himfunsiglarn's most sacred site is Leps in Germany.

Ortsisbaf Fumwotyatt Himfunsiglarn's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Ortsisbaf Fumwotyatt Himfunsiglarn.

2. You must love Ortsisbaf Fumwotyatt Himfunsiglarn.

3. Snakes are not to be trusted.

4. Never think ill of sick eagles.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.