Rakcissvid is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, almighty dolphin.

Rakcissvid created parasitic wasps seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Rakcissvid, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Rakcissvid, he will turn you into a puffin.

Rakcissvid's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Rakcissvid's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about the strong nuclear force.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Do not dye your hair gray.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of lead.

5. Never pour water over plants.