Ganjinbet is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, caring grasshopper.

Ganjinbet created dark energy eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Ganjinbet, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Ganjinbet, it will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Ganjinbet's most sacred site is Villaseta in Italy.

Ganjinbet's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Ganjinbet.

3. Never wear jumpers.

4. Never talk about hamsters.

5. Always take life seriously.