Getzanril is a god.

It takes the form of a small, able slug.

Getzanril created a photon four million years ago.

If you believe in Getzanril, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Getzanril, it will turn you into a tree.

Getzanril's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Getzanril's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. You must never eat tomatoes.

3. Do not take Getzanril's name in vain.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Getzanril.

5. Never talk about comets.