Betyatthot is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, slow capybara.

Betyatthot created matter five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Betyatthot, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Betyatthot, he will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Betyatthot's most sacred site is Finnmark in Norway.

Betyatthot's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Never feed cucumbers to goats while wearing fawn stockings.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Never mention rats.