Minkamquat Tammabwot is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, duplicitous beaver.

Minkamquat Tammabwot created the solar system nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Minkamquat Tammabwot, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Minkamquat Tammabwot, it will send two she bears to sort you out.

Minkamquat Tammabwot's most sacred site is Hoddom in Scotland.

Minkamquat Tammabwot's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about planets.

2. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Never talk about gravity.