Pakhatgun is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, sage narwhal.

Pakhatgun created the Sunflower Galaxy three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Pakhatgun, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Pakhatgun, he will destroy your home planet.

Pakhatgun's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Pakhatgun's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.

2. Do not dye your hair blue.

3. Do not kill ants.

4. Never paint your chest green.

5. Erect a large iron sculpture of Pakhatgun on top of all buildings.