Gomabflow Ciportyatt is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, unthoughtful whale.

Gomabflow Ciportyatt created dark matter eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gomabflow Ciportyatt, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Gomabflow Ciportyatt, she will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Gomabflow Ciportyatt's most sacred site is Tatul in Bulgaria.

Gomabflow Ciportyatt's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if three mice approach from the west.

2. Never think about horizontal gene transfer.

3. Always obey Gomabflow Ciportyatt's priests.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of copper.